The Graceful Boon

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YOUR BIGGEST BURDENS CAN TURN INTO YOUR BIGGEST BLESSINGS

Story By: Bobbie Wayne

Have you ever looked back on past situations in your life that were so hurtful, but now its funny. Well, that’s pretty much how all my past situations are. Let me tell you how I met the love of my life chasing after a guy who I THOUGHT was the love of my life. Hear me well. I COMPLETELY ADVISE THAT YOU DON’T FOLLOW IN MY SHENANIGANS. I was 19 years old when all of this started so you should know this is about to be a wild story.

How It Started

Back when I was younger, I met this guy who was a manager where I worked he was much older than me, but he looked young and he was really sweet. I instantly had the biggest crush on him. A few months later, we became inseparable. I was so in love. He was absolutely perfect. He cooked for me, he gave the best massages, and ALWAYS opened every door. My mother and I have always had a rocky relationship. He pretty much took me in. When he got paid he literally would give me his card. I never had to ask for anything. He was amazing. The problem was he was damaged. He had been married before and his ex-wife left big wound. A wound that i didn’t see at first. Which of course we never know until about a year or two later. Raise your hand if you’ve been there. Anyway things were going really well. Then they transferred him to a different work site. I’d gotten so used to being with him at home and at work. I wanted to come too, so we got me transferred with him.

Months later, came another transfer lol. Yes i followed him to every site and I was very good at my job so it was never a problem. One day, he was asleep and his phone rung. The job would call for last minute meetings, so I checked his phone, and sure enough, there was a meeting, but i also saw more than what I bargained for. There were messages between him and his ex-wife. That basically told me he had cheated on me. I WAS HOT! In the words of my mother “you coulda lit a cigarette off of me”. Of course, he gave me a stupid lie, and I decided to try to let it go. We ended up getting transferred again, and this time, everyone knew we were a package deal.

This time ended up being a little bit different. They didn’t like the fact that we were dating. Despite this, we were always professional in the workplace. I’d never ask him to leave his management position, so I knew I’d be having to find another job soon, but I just kept quiet and tried to not give them a reason to bother me. Meanwhile, I ran into more messages. This time, though, they weren’t from his ex-wife anymore.They were from other women. Yes, PLURAL “WOMEN”. The thing is, if you know me from my younger years i used to fight when i was bullied i cuss like a sailor and I don’t take any crap. But because he was older i always tried to take a different more mature approach. I literally NEVER argued with this man and I always tried to be a good woman to him because I really was in love with him and wanted to marry him. But he was constantly hurting me. There were plenty of nights I laid next to him with my back turned and just cried. And on top of being hurt, I had to be “passive” about it. Thats not even me! It was literally just boiling my blood. But I still wanted him. I still loved him.

PAY ATTENTION (RECAP)

I fell in love. I followed him to 3 different workplaces. Now it was time for me to find a new job. Like I said, the new work site was giving me crap about the boyfriend/girlfriend situation, so it was time to find something else. Coincidentally, one of our coworkers told me that he had a second job and that they were hiring. He told me where to go and who to talk to and sure enough I got hired. It was the same type of job that i was already doing so it was a easy transition and everyone was nice. Later on, I’d find out that I caught someone’s eye. Still with the cheater and going through extreme emotions, it was starting to get bad. I was angry. I was sad. I was hurt. But I still wanted HIM.

One day before work, the phone rung again while he was asleep. I went to work STEAMING. Now the manager at my new job actually knew my boyfriend. They’d known each other for years, so he was nice to me from day one. When he saw my face when I walked into work and he came over instantly and asked what was wrong. At that point, I “broke” my anger and went to extreme sadness at the snap of a finger. I was crying so hard. People were looking at me. He told me to go out to my car and get myself together. At this point, I was mentally drained and tired. But I made it through the day. And the next day. I just tried to block all of my hurt out and stay busy at work. Then, I finally noticed HIM.

It was one of my coworkers who was coincidentally a “manager”. He’d literally been working there the whole time, but I was in love, and I hadn’t even looked at another man in forever. But for some reason, I finally noticed him. It was regular laughs and talks at work like normal. A of couple weeks later, it was almost time for me to get off work. Somebody asked the cute guy, “What are you doing when you get off work?” He said, “Bobbie and I are gonna go have drinks”. I spun my head around so fast that I almost broke my neck. My response was, “We are???” He gave me a smile and said “yeah”. I was lost, but it actually worked out perfectly because I was planning to get off and crack open a bottle of wine anyway because the cheater was still out working. So we got off work. We grabbed some wine and just sat in the car, listened to music, and talked for HOURS. That was how it all started. Now, mind you, it got a little bit crazy when the cheater found out, but we won’t get into all that drama. I ended up being in a relationship with the cute guy, “Rodney”, and the cheater and I finally broke up. I’ve now been with Rodney for almost 7 years. We’re engaged and we have 3 beautiful babies.

The Point

I went through hell with the cheater. He crushed my soul and damaged me in ways I never knew I could be hurt. But the timeline led to the best thing that’s ever happened to me. If I never would’ve met the cheater, if I never would’ve followed him to the other jobs, I never would’ve met the coworker that referred me to the new job which ended up being where I met THE REAL love of my life. It’s going to sound crazy but do you know that the cheater and I are
still very good friends until this day. It didn’t happen like that right away, but he apologizes to me about once a year. He and Rodney even talk from time to time. The cheater was never a bad guy. He just was struggling after his own marriage. He always tells me, “I loved you, you just came along when i wasn’t ready FOR YOU”. I can honestly say that I thank god for him. There were so many lessons i learned from being with him. And if it wasn’t for meeting him i wouldn’t be where I am today i wouldn’t have Rodney – The man of my dreams, I wouldn’t have my beautiful kids. And to top it all off, I still have a very good life-long friend. So it’s true. Burdens CAN be blessings you just have to take a moment and reflect on the burden and look at where you
are now.

Ways to connect With Bobbie directly:

Website https://mamasinsight.com/

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/mamasinsight/

Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/mamasinsight/_created/

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