Allura Grant: A Female Friendship As A Signified Love In A Woman’s Life – And Its Portrayal In All’s Fair And Other Similar TV Shows

Perhaps the most gut-wrenching thing I’ve watched recently was Kim Kardashian recalling how her ex-husband, Kanye West, accusing her of faking her 2016 Paris robbery, which was a near-death experience. On a recent episode of her family’s reality show, The Kardashians, she tearfully said, ‘My ex-husband had said, ‘And you faked your robbery for a TV show,’ and had said that in front of all these people. That was a knife to my heart. Just to think that someone wouldn’t believe you — that’s so close to you, that should know you, that should know how much that affected your life — it just really bothered me. You don’t know who I am.’

The robbery was anything but fake. Nine whole years after the ordeal, the case was brought to justice and everyone involved was charged in contempt manner. I think that a lot of people out there in the world can agree that many things about the Kardashian-Jenner family are fake, but most DEFINITELY not this. She was tied up and restricted with zip ties, duct tape, and handcuffs. The robber threw her in a bathtub while they ransacked her room as they used duct tape to cover her eyes and mouth. As she told David Letterman in 2020, she was fully prepared that the robbers would rape her that night.

As she reflected on the 2016 event and the courtroom hearing that followed in May of this year, Kardashian’s said in a confessional, ‘To finally go to trial and face these people and hear their accounts and apologies, I’m like, ‘See, guys, it was real.’ I’m happy it’s over. I’m just not nervous. This was less than 10 minutes of my life. I’ve lived an amazing life. That’s always given me a little bit of peace, just to know — what was it? Eight, nine minutes? — of pure terror and panic aren’t going to ruin me.’

Kimye, as the public knew them during the years they were married, were together between 2012 and 2021, with their divorce being finalized in 2022, after having been friends for years and West having feelings for her from the start. They have four children together. Since their divorce, there seems to have been nothing but turmoil, agony, and grief. Even incidents of stalking, public humiliation and revenge porn were involved, as West’s mental health spiraled out of control when Kardashian became romantically involved with comedian and actor Pete Davidson. Kardashian previously revealed that his mental breaks, as well as not feeling safe emotionally throughout their relationship was what led to the divorce. And despite it all, she still wouldn’t consider it a failure.

In spite of the lack of respect he’d shown her through the years since their divorce, as well as in their past marriage, Kardashian prioritizes her children’s well-being, aiming to be a good co-parent and shield them from drama, even while navigating a complex relationship with their father. Since she broke off her relationship with West, Kardashian had only publicly dated Davidson, while any other relationship(s) she might’ve had since remained private. Most recently, she opened up about her newfound desire to remain single after her All’s Fair co-star Sarah Paulson said she wanted to see her have a great romance in her life. Kardashian said, ‘I know Sarah feels like I have put up this wall to overprotect myself so that I just may be don’t open up to love, but it’s OK to close down a bit and focus on the things that I want in life. I’m the biggest hopeless romantic. When the right person comes along, I’ll be so ready and everything will be fine.’

And speaking of…

All’s Fair is a legal drama television series created by Ryan Murphy, and starring Kardashian, Naomi Watts, Niecy Nash-Betts, Teyana Taylor, Sarah Paulson and Glenn Close. I personally have never had an interest in watching any of Ryan Murphy’s creations, particularly in his post-Glee and Scream Queens work. Seeing as how his newest project was given a 0% rating on Rotten Tomatoes completely changed my view on not wanting to ever revisit Murphy’s work. I was inevitably intrigued. And so, I decided to give the show a try.

I have to be honest – I only lasted one episode. It wasn’t that I was even disappointed. The acting wasn’t so terrible. Kardashian was actually one of the better actors on the show – much to my surprise. I was just confused as to what Naomi Watts was thinking when she took the role of Liberty Ronson. Then again, she produced the series, along with Kardashian’s and her mother, Kris Jenner. She will next appear in another Ryan Murphy project, Love Story, a visual story chronicling the romance between John F. Kennedy Jr. and Carolyn Bessette Kennedy, both of whom tragically died in 1999 in a plane crash alongside Bessette’s sister, set to be released next year.

Despite All’s Fair being panned by critics, the show was a hit. It ranked No. 1 on Hulu’s “Top 15 Today” list—a daily updated list of the platform’s most-watched titles—on its November 4th premiere. The series became Hulu’s most-watched premiere for an original scripted series in three years, attracting approximately 3.2 million viewers globally within three days of release. The streaming service then announced that the show generated over 7 billion social media impressions and 190 million video views following its debut. In the U.S alone, All’s Fair generated 2.61 million hours viewed for the October 31 and November 6, and in the following week, the series placed No. 13 overall with 3.9 million hours viewed. For the week of November 14–20, the show recorded 636,059 views, ranking 13th for the week. By November 20, content tied to All’s Fair had accumulated a total of 10 billion social media impressions.

Allura Grant is the character Kardashian plays in the show. She’s first introduced as being ambitious, strong-willed, and a woman of her worth. That worth she showed in herself was in her work. In the very first episode, she opens her own law firm alongside her co-workers and friends, Liberty and Emerald Greene, played by Nash. The trio also bring in Milan, played by Teyana Taylor, as their assistant. She was the happiest in her work, feeling like she was making a difference in people’s lives. Her personal life, on the other hand, was looking much different.

Even though she was in what seemed like a happy relationship with Chase Munroe, played by Matthew Noszka, a man 10 years younger than her, Allura seemed to have been always on edge whenever she was around him. Whenever she was around him, she wasn’t the same bubbly, confident woman she was when she was at work – the one place she truly seemed to have loved. chase starts off by pretending he’d forgotten his and Allura’s anniversary, when in actuality, he got her a gigantic piece of jewelry as a present. Allura, shocked by the kind gesture, initiates sex as a way of saying ‘thank you’ without words.

Later in the episode, Chase breaks up with Allura, telling her that whenever he was with her, he felt less of a man because she was so much more successful than him. By the end of the 40 minute running time, we learned that he was actually having an affair with Milan. Confused by the sudden breakup, Allura relied on her two best friends for comfort. Allura began to question everything about herself; if she was good enough. Her friends were there to remind that she was, in fact, good enough.

While everyone could agree that All’s Fair is mostly about glamour and throwing wealth into the viewers’ faces, it’s also about womanhood, friendship, love in different forms, empowerment and self-preservation. I laughed at the show’s absurd production, I couldn’t help myself but feel something too. The more the episode progressed, the more I realized just how important female friendships are, especially during tough times.

Beyonce once said, ‘I love my husband, but it is nothing like a conversation with a woman that understands you. I grow so much from those conversations.’ Female friendships, in essence, are what make us who we are in the end. They shape us. They solidify us. Women are different than men. We think differently. We act differently. We solve problems differently. We women were more emotionally driven rather than logically driven. This in itself is exactly what makes female friendships so vital to our existence.

All’s Fair isn’t the first show to represent the importance of female friendships. It was, however, the first show to truly showcase female relationships as the prime reason for women’s success as an aspiration in its premise. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that there are only 9 episodes (so far). Degrassi, the long running Canadian teen drama, ran for way, way more episodes. I was particularly reminded of season 5 of the show. It was when Spike was separated from her husband, Snake, after he’d cheated on her with another woman. Her daughter, Emma, whom Spike had when she was 16 years old and still a student at Degrassi, saw her mother’s sorrowful sadness, so she called Spike’s best friend, Caitlin, to cheer her up. Caitlin, with no hesitation in her heart, came out to Toronto on short notice all the way from Los Angeles.

The special surprise brought Spike unexpected joy; and tears. As much as Caitlin tried to cheer her up, Spike just couldn’t stop thinking of what she’d shared with Snake. What Caitlin did for as a friend helped her realize that. As mad as she was, she still loved the person who betrayed her. Getting Caitlin to come be for her mother was the best thing she could’ve done. On the other side of the coin, Emma was going through her own turmoil in her life. Her parents’ separation was stressful on her body and mind, especially as she was in the midst of it all as she was the one who saw Snake cheating on her mother. She was also stressed out as she was dating someone who put out revenge porn on her best friend, Manny, who was living with her at the time after her parents kicked her out.

With everything going on, Emma developed an eating disorder, and she even started making Manny divulge into unhealthy lifestyle choices alongside her. Luckily, Manny was able to get out of it without much damage. Emma, on the other hand, wasn’t so fortunate. She went too far, until it took over her entire life. Despite her feeling betrayed by her friend who started dating the guy who literally aimed to ruin her entire life and future, Manny did everything she possibly could to help her friend, even if it meant having something to do with the person that aimed to destroy her. No matter how hard Emma tried to push her, as well as everyone else, away, and no matter how many times she kept telling them she was fine, Manny never gave on her.

Emma’s friendship with Manny was more significant than any romantic relationship she ever had. This brings me to discuss why female friendships are more significant than any romantic partner a woman might ever have in her life. They’re crucial for well-being, offering unique emotional support, resilience, and a sense of belonging that often surpasses the stability or drama of romantic relationships, providing deeper understanding, consistent loyalty, and a vital support system that reduces stress, boosts happiness, and even extends lifespan, acting as a bedrock for navigating life’s challenges. While romance has its place, these platonic bonds provide unconditional acceptance, a shared history, and a safe space for vulnerability, making them fundamental to a woman’s overall health and fulfillment. To break it down more thoroughly:

Why Female Friendships Shine:

• Unconditional Support: Friends offer a non-judgmental space to share vulnerabilities, frustrations, and joys, often providing more reliable emotional backup than romantic partners.

• Mental & Physical Health: Strong friendships are linked to lower depression rates, greater life satisfaction, and even increased longevity, improving overall well-being.

• Resilience & Stability: These bonds provide crucial stability, especially as romantic priorities shift, offering strength and laughter, particularly in later life.

• Deeper Understanding: Female friendships often involve unique communication, mirroring, and shared experiences that foster deep, intuitive connections, notes Psychology Today.

• Less Expectation, More Freedom: Platonic bonds typically come with fewer expectations and less emotional drama than romantic relationships, allowing for more authentic connection, say Allo Health.

• Life’s Constant Companions: While romantic partners may come and go, lifelong friends are often the ones who pick up the pieces and help you navigate major life crises, according to ReadUnwritten. 

Shifting Societal Views:

• Generational shifts, especially among Gen Z, show a growing trend to value friendships on par with romantic love, recognizing that fulfillment doesn’t hinge solely on romance, as reported by New York Post.

• Research indicates women often prioritize friendship for happiness and resilience, sometimes even fearing loneliness more than being single, notes the Daily Mail. 

Ultimately, prioritizing and nurturing these deep platonic bonds is just as vital as tending to romance, creating a richer, more resilient life, say Psychology Today and The Globe and Mail. 

Sex And The City is another series that transcended the genre of non-sexual love between female friends. In the original SATC series, there’s even an entire episode dedicated specifically to the significance of the friendship between Carrie, Charlotte, Samantha and Miranda. After Charlotte, Samantha and Miranda all missed Carrie’s 35th birthday, the four friends go to a coffee shop. Carrie is visibly distraught at how she spent her birthday alone. She didn’t even want to celebrate her birthday. She was persuaded by her friends, and they didn’t end up showing up at all. Her loneliness became evidently clear as she hopelessly and embarrassingly waited for everyone to show up at the restaurant. Charlotte, being the hopeless romantic that she is, asked her three best friends if they wanted to be each other’s soulmates and have the men they date be the cherries on top. Miranda and Samantha were happy about Charlotte’s proposition. Carrie, on the other hand…

Carrie’s happiness heavily relied on whether or not she had a man in her life. Moreover, she was only satisfied when she was with Mr. Big. When she was with any other man, she’d sabotage the entire relationship. This was especially true when she was with Aidan. While her happiness depended on the mere idea of getting Big, she wasn’t actually happy when she was in a relationship with him. Being with Big made her absolutely, 100% crazy. Chasing him around and begging him to choose her for years on end made her absolutely crazy.

How a woman defines her happiness is her own personal journey. That happiness highly her personal values, choices, and life circumstances. Common themes associated with happiness include:

• Self-Understanding and Acceptance: Having a clear sense of identity, knowing what she wants in life (for the most part), and practicing unconditional self-love and acceptance.

• Healthy Relationships: Cultivating and maintaining positive, supportive relationships with friends, family, and a partner, which are universally important at any age.

• Personal Growth and Purpose: Engaging in self-improvement, pursuing hobbies, and having a sense of meaning and purpose in life, often through work that is enjoyable and provides satisfaction.

• Stability and Well-being: Taking care of physical, mental, and emotional health, being in a better or stable financial situation, and feeling secure in her living conditions.

• Autonomy and Freedom: Having the freedom to make her own choices and live life on her own terms, rather than based on external expectations or a pre-defined “blueprint” of what a woman “should” be. 

Ultimately, happiness is often defined by a feeling of contentment and satisfaction with the choices made and the life being lived, regardless of whether it matches traditional societal milestones like marriage, children, or a specific career path. 

One thing about a woman’s definition of happiness is that it constantly changes; ever so evolving. It never stays the same. Those changes come with age, maturity, experience and a sense of self-preservation. Happiness isn’t an achievement. It’s an absence . Absence of toxic people. It’s a presence. Presence of good people who love you wholeheartedly. The 5 pillars of happiness are PERMA – Positive Emotion, Engagement, Relationships, Meaning and Accomplishment.

Female friendships are essentially the pillar to a woman’s life. They’re what brings her joy, comfort, and a meaningful sense of being. Female friendships offer a deep emotional support, reducing stress and anxiety, boosting mood through hormones like serotonin and oxytocin, improving self-esteem, and even extending life, with studies showing strong connections combat loneliness and isolation, fostering a “tend-and-befriend” response to stress, and providing validation through shared vulnerability. Nurturing these bonds through consistent connection and mutual support is key to overall well-being, acting as a powerful, natural antidepressant. To break it down more thoroughly:

Key benefits for happiness and health:

• Stress Reduction: Engaging with friends lowers cortisol (stress hormone) and promotes oxytocin, the bonding hormone, helping women manage stress more effectively.

• Mood Enhancement: Increased serotonin and dopamine levels lead to better moods and feelings of well-being.

• Emotional Resilience: Friendships provide a safe space for vulnerability, validation, and support during tough times, boosting confidence and self-worth.

• Longevity: Strong platonic relationships are linked to longer, healthier lives.

• Sense of Belonging: They combat loneliness, a significant risk factor for depression, and foster a sense of community. 

How they foster happiness:

• In-depth Conversation: Real voice-to-voice connection helps share secrets and build intimacy.

• Mutual Support: Celebrating successes and navigating challenges together strengthens bonds.

• Shared Healthy Habits: Friends can motivate each other to exercise and make healthier choices.

• “Tend-and-Befriend”: A unique female stress response that involves nurturing others and connecting for support, strengthening social ties. 

Nurturing strong friendships:

• Prioritize Connection: Make time for consistent interactions, both in-person and digitally.

• Be Vulnerable: Allow yourself to be imperfect and share openly; true friends accept you as you are.

• Support Healthy Choices: Align with friends who support your goals, but find different friends for different activities if needed.

• Recognize Toxic Patterns: Learn to step back from friendships that drain your energy, say inside Columbia, as healthy connections are vital. 

As much as I wanted to hate All’s Fair with a passion, I couldn’t help but feel the need to make a point of saying just how truly amazing it was to see that the main piece of the puzzle in what the series is all about is the source of female friendships. It’s actually the central theme of the entire show. Throughout the show, these friendships are friendships are frequently tested by secrets, betrayals, and the machinations of the show’s antagonist, Carrington Lane, played by Paulson. She actively seeks to destroy Allura and her colleagues, poisoning their relationships and exploiting their insecurities in a plan for revenge. This rivalry is a major plot point, especially as Chase becomes Carr’s client.

No matter what, it always came down to Allura and the strong bond she shared with her friends. And I absolutely fucking LOVED it. No matter how ridiculous the series got, it signified that empowerment and female alliances can be messy, showcasing women who fight for each other but also face internal conflict and betrayal. But no matter what, they always came to each other. THAT is true love. No matter how old we are, or where life takes us, we always need the love our friends.