Women & Health: The Sexism Women Face By Healthcare Providers In Canada

My friend and I recently had a discussion on health. More specifically, we started discussing women’s health. She and I don’t have much in common. But one thing that we do have in common is that we both have PCOS. In fact, we connected because of our shared diagnosis when initially met. But despite our shared diagnosis, we have very different stories. I was officially diagnosed with PCOS by my fertility doctor, which was just 2 years ago. I had PCOS symptoms that started when I was 15 years old. The most noticeable ones were hair growth where there wasn’t supposed be, which was all over my body, and hair loss where there wasn’t supposed to be, which was on my head and around my sculpt. I attempted to understand what was going on with my body so that I could get an official diagnosis and treatment, but all I got from any doctor was them telling me it was due to stress. It wasn’t until I had a full scan of my body during my entire monthly cycle that I got that official word that I’d been looking for for years. Any doctor I saw before that in regards to that matter told me that everything I was going through was due to stress.

My friend had an entirely different story of her journey with PCOS. She never had any issues until she became sexually active. Once her relationship with her now-husband became serious, she decided to go on birth control. That led to her experiencing late periods, which then led to her missing her period for a total of 14 months. This, of course, led to a PCOS diagnosis. The reason why she was diagnosed so fast and I wasn’t was because unlike her, I had my period every month. I never missed a period, but I certainly experienced late periods. The longest I was ever late was a period of two weeks. Because of this, doctors and health professionals told me not to stress and everything would turn out just fine.

Because she wasn’t happy with how her medical team treated her newly diagnosed hormonal disease, my friend decided to take matters into her own hands. It all came down to her diet and overall lifestyle. She saw positive changes within 4 months. In the first few months that she started having regular periods, she got pregnant. Her daughter is almost 2 years old, just a few months older than my son, and they make great friends. It was a happy ending for my friend as she got the family she so longed for and didn’t know she could have. And yet, it wasn’t much of an ending, because the work never actually ends when it comes to your health.

In the midst of our chit chat of our shared health struggles, my friend made a really good point, and that is that women’s health isn’t taken seriously by medical professionals. There’s a certain sexism that comes with health. Her sentiment immediately reminded me of my early health struggles. No, not my early struggles with cerebral palsy; rather my early struggles with epilepsy, as these struggles I had to deal with on my own as a woman without my parents having to answer for me. It was a scary time for me, in particular. At the time, I felt that my life really depended on these health professionals that I was seeing, and I was seeing them more than I saw anyone else in my life at the time.

I came a long way since then. Now, 8 years following my first seizure that followed the fateful car accident I survived in 2015, I take care of my health – physical health, chronic health, and mental health – by my own accountability. It took me a lot of time, stress and struggles to get to where I am now. My last straw, I’d say, in continuing believing medical professionals and giving them any sort chances was once I had my son, and even thereafter. I gave them one last chance after I said ‘I’m f*cking done with this sh*t!’ just make sure that I wasn’t making a mistake, and it did NOT disappoint.

I never thought of my doctors’ treatments towards me as being sexist. I just thought of it as doctors treating me as a client rather than a patient; a doctor being a business entity. But then I realized……A business actually provides a service that actually benefits the client, whereas any doctor has only money on their brains. ‘How can I get more money out of this person?’ is what they ask themselves everyday. Now that I look back on my path during those first years of my epilepsy diagnosis, I can certainly say that the very first doctor who treated me for epilepsy certainly had money on his brain when it comes to me. In fact, he not only didn’t care about my health and well-being, but he laughed at my vulnerability too.

Each time I saw the neurologist in question, all he’d do was prescribe me more and more pills. I felt like I was dying. And I almost did, in fact, die because of his mistreatment. At some point, I decided to slowly stop taking the medication I was prescribed completely, and I noticed I felt much, much better. I was still having seizures as usual, but at least I felt like a human freaking being. I was told by a different neurologist that had I continued on taking the medication as I was told to, I would’ve OD’d. My one little decision saved my life. But I knew that I need to make changes in my health care. So, without hesitation or doubt, I took my medical records from the neurologist and never saw him again. Because healthcare in Israel is so much more advanced in Israel, I decided that my next step in my health journey would be to go to Israel. I condidered to going the US to get treatment, but as soon as I called the medical office, the secretary was about to set up an appointment for me for a brain surgery. That is without even knowing who I am, looking at my medical history, and not even booking a consultation with the neurologist.

While In Israel, I saw a neurologist that was considered to be the best in the world. But before I saw him for that fateful appointment, I’d gone through three weeks of endless medical tests. It was advised to conduct those tests after another doctor took interest in me by overhearing my story, and got to the conclusion that that was the right thing to do. And he gave that recommendation free of charge. These were tests that weren’t available in Canada, or in North America at all. The results of all these tests were then sent Denmark to be analyzed there. Finally, it was time to see the neurologist. He was very straight to the point. He gave me everything I needed when it came down to the care of my health. He gave me all the information I needed. He answered all my questions. And he gave me a thorough step-by-step guide to my future. Most notably, he was basing a guide to my future on the fact that I was planning to get pregnant at the time. One thing he said to me during our consultation that is notable to mention was, ‘Canada is a big country. I’m sure you can find a good doctor that will care for you and tailor to your needs.’ I didn’t know whether I should laugh or cry in that moment. I decided to chuckle.

Nevertheless, that particular appointment with the neurologist that is considered to be the best of the best in the world made me excited for the future; my future. I was excited to finally be able to take control of my life. Particularly, I was excited for family planning. With that in mind, As soon as I returned home from Israel, I searched for a new neurologist to treat me. Specifically, I was looking for a neurologist who specialized in epilepsy and pregnancy. I found just the one, but it took an entire year to finally get an appointment with him. In the meantime, my family doctor treated me. He prescribed the new anti-seizure medication that was recommended to me based on my treatment and testing done in Israel. He prescribed me the bare minimum dosage of Keppra Brand Name; a medication that would be safe to take during pregnancy.

It was right before the pandemic that I saw this perfectly matched neurologist. My first impression of him was positive. In the midst of all the chaos, my health drastically improved. I was on the road to recovery. I felt like a whole new person. My first appointment with my new neurologist came in December 2019. By that point, I’d taken my medication for a year and a half. A lot had changed in a year and a half. My condition worsened, and it worsened to the point that it became worse than what it was at the beginning. My seizure frequency increased, and instead of suffering only focal seizures throughout the day, I began experiencing grand-mal seizures, and even seizures in my sleep. Not only that, but I was experiencing signs of depression. The new neurologist didn’t know what to do with me anymore. Nevertheless, he still treated me as his patient.

Even though my condition gradually worsened, I was still very optimistic about getting pregnant, and I did everything I could to get to that point. In October 2021, after several years of trying for a baby and being unsuccessful at it, IVF treatments finally commenced. During that time, I was, for some odd reason that no one understood, transferred over to another neurologist; a female neurologist this time. From the moment I first spoke with her on the phone, I knew it was complete and utter bullsh*t. But, to my utter disappointment, I decided to give the woman a chance.

The IVF transfer that I did in October 2021 didn’t end up working. After having such a hard time over the years, and realizing what a negative effect my infertility journey had on my overall health, my husband and I decided to take a break. I even considered giving up on having a child altogether and living a child-free life, but my insisted we take a break and get back to it in a couple of years. Miraculously, I got pregnant naturally only 3 months later despite the fact that I was told there was little to 0 chance I’d ever get pregnant naturally.

Of course, as you now know, even though I was considering to living a child-free life, I decided to keep the baby. I was excited, happy, nervous, and anxious all at the same time. My pregnancy did come with its own set of complications. It wasn’t smooth-sailing. I suffered two grand-mal seizures throughout the middle and later stages of my pregnancy. It’s important to note that if a woman suffers a grand-mal seizure during pregnancy, it’s life threatening – both for the baby and for her. That’s why a pregnancy for a woman with epilepsy is considered to be high risk. It doesn’t mean it’s impossible to have a baby. Look at me. In such a case, immediate medical attention and care from a neurologist, is necessary.

I got none of that care from neither one of my neurologists. When I called my female neurologist that was assigned to me for the time I was on fertility treatments and during my pregnancy only had an earliest appointment merely weeks following my first grand-mal seizure, which ended up being only days before my already scheduled appointment with her. I then called my regular neurologist, and he said he was too busy for me. To say that I was enraged would be a real understatement. Both neurologists put my life on the line, and I certainly didn’t let that sh*t slide; not anymore. I demanded a call with my new neurologist and let him know what I thought of the entire situation. I told him he sent me to a female neurologist who had to be reminded I was pregnant at each appointment. I told him that I was starting to question his credentials as, judging by how he was treating me as of late, I could do a better job treating his patients. I told him that my original neurologist didn’t seem so bad after what he pulled with me, because he at least found time for me during a life-threatening emergency. I told him that at the pace the pace that everyone’s going at , there’s no point for me to have a neurologist at all because I wasn’t being treated properly, but both of them were getting money out of me regardless.

And much, much more.

The neurologist seemed to be in shock. He said it was because he didn’t realize things were so bad and so serious, but I think the real reason he was shocked is because he didn’t think I was strong enough to stand up for myself at such a vulnerable time. The thing with being ill with a chronic illness such as epilepsy, as well as having a disability such as cerebral palsy, there’s a notion that there’s a vulnerability that comes with it. And there is, if such disability and/or illness takes over you, your brain, and your body. Doctors, any type of doctor, aims to treat their patients to get to that vulnerable so that they could get more money out of their patients. To me, it seemed like my original neurologist got tired of me and didn’t know what to do with me, so he sent me to another neurologist to be her problem rather than his. He said he sent me to her so that I could get a female perspective, but that’s just not even remotely a thing. And because of that, people become inadequate to be their normal selves and live their normal lives.

Following my breakthrough with my original, regular neurologist, we agreed that I’d only be seeing him for the rest of my pregnancy. Another one of his arguments was that he sent me to a female neurologist so I could get a female perspective during family planning and eventual pregnancy,but as confirmed by my OBGYN, that’s not even a thing. Regardless, him and I getting on the same page ended up being completely useless as the next time I had an appointment with him was the day after I had my son. During that call, he told me how to manage my pills for after my pregnancy.

I heard what he said, but I certainly wasn’t listening. I didn’t trust him anymore. I had my son in November 2022. By February 2023, I completely stopped taking my anti-seizure medication despite doctors orders. I saw drastic improvements in my health within a week. Not only was I not having seizures, but I also started feeling stronger than ever, mentally, emotionally and physically. I could finally be able to control my own life; to control my own destiny. I was able to take full care of my son and tailor to his needs rather than have others tailor to my needs and take of my son.

With that being said, my neurologist and I said our goodbyes. There was no reason for us to see each other anymore, and I couldn’t be happier about it. I needed to be in charge of my own health and well-being, and that was exactly what I was about to do. Now, more than a year later, I do that by taking control of my lifestyle. That includes nutrition, sleep, my social life, and stress management. Instead of in-taking the anti-seizure medication everyday twice a day, I in-take Larozepam, a standard medication to treat anxiety, as well as a common drug used for epilepsy patients, which is something neurologists don’t tell their patients because they don’t get much out of prescribing them.

Following my breakup with my neurologist, I had to do one last thing that had to do with my anti-seizure medication. Due to me in-taking that medication, I suffered a severe hair loss, which was on top of my PCOS symptoms. I went to another specialist who diagnosed me with alopecia. He then prescribed me a medical hair product that I previously took for years, but had to stop because it was potentially causing me to have seizures. After years of using that product, I noticed that it was written on the bottle in very, very small letters that it could potentially cause a seizure. As he prescribed me that hair product, I asked him 3 times if I could have a seizure when using it. He said no. I told him I had epilepsy and told me he worked with people with epilepsy before. I put my trust in that man, and it came at a price. I ended up having a seizure within a week of using the hair product. I wasn’t enraged this time. I was hopeful, because I knew that would be the very last time I’d ever listen to a doctor who’s only thinking of how much money or she can get from me. I’m never seeing a doctor who sees me as a client rather than a patient.

Olivia Munn, an actress, recently opened up about her breast cancer in 2023. She did a monogram, which didn’t detect any health concerns. But here’s the kicker. A monogram detects only 4 out 5 types of breast cancer. A doctor went out of her way and took Munn by her wings to get a detailed testing done on her, and that was the only way Munn’s cancer was detected. The reason why I’m mentioning Munn on this blog post is because this is relevant to what this blog, as her doctor and the doctor that took interest in my condition who recommended my treatment plan in Israel had something in common. It was only thanks to these selfless doctors that I, and Olivia Munn, could finally get the proper medical treatments that could save our lives. The fact that my conditioned worsened as soon as I got to see a neurologist following my trip to Israel told me a heck of a lot.

Going back to my friend’s sentiment on how it’s a sexist world we live when it comes down to the healthcare system in Canada, I do somewhat agree with her. But there’s much more to it than healthcare providers just being sexist. Health care providers, Canadian ones in particular, often mistreat their patients on purpose. They want their condition to get worse because they could get something out of their patients…eergh… clients. That’s how they get most money. Their main targets are those patients who are vulnerable. And who are the ones that are considered to be most vulnerable? Women. It’s especially true when women go through health struggles. Statistically, women tend to go through a lot more health struggles than men, which is something that benefits any type of doctor. It’s sexism, but with a reason Doctors are careless and dismissive, and a lot of the times, doctors prefer their patients die; for monetary reasons.

And because I refused to be their victim, I decided that I’d never experience what I’d experienced for so many years by medical professionals – lies, manipulation – abuse. I wanted to live life freely, and no one would ever dare to tell me how to do so…

Just recently, I connected with someone who moved to Canada with her son. Her son is studying to be a doctor. When I learned that, I told him, word by word, that I really hope he’d get his medical license, because Canada lacks doctors that actually care about and have empathy for their patients. I meant every single word I said to him, and I hope he’s the one person in the next generation that can eventually break the cycle. Doctors don’t have our best interests, and that’s why we’re forced to take matters into our own hands. Things need to change, however, because not everyone is as strong minded and has enough willingness to do what my friend and I did, which was take our power back away from doctors.