Bre Tiesi: Does A Better Understanding Of Emotional Intelligence And Friendships REALLY Make Women Better Entrepreneurs?

I hate to admit this, like absolutely hate to admit this, but ‘Selling Sunset’ was my go-to guilty pleasure throughout the pandemic. Who doesn’t want to watch a bunch of middle-aged women gossip, fight, and bicker about complete nonsense, am I right? I might be exaggerating just a bit about the women’s age group in the show. Most of them are in their 30’s and 40’s. What I’m not exaggerating about, though, is the gossiping, fighting and bickering that goes on through the series. The show was meant to be all about real estate and the business side of things, but the drama that had gone on in the office between the ladies just took over. There were some emotional moments, though, like Chrishell Stause storyline in the aftermath of her divorce from ‘This Is Us’ actor, Justin Hartley, Christine Quinn’s storyline in the aftermath of her having a baby, specifically her birthing story, as well as Mary Bonnet’s pregnancy and miscarriage.

It all started when Chrishell came to the office as a new agent. She previously worked as an actress on ‘Days Of Our Lives’ with Sofia Pernas, who’s now married to Chrishell’s ex-husband. Christine, a longtime real estate agent at Oppenheim Group, didn’t like her from the very beginning. From their very first encounter at an office party in season 1 episode 1. Their beef and dislike of each other played out all throughout Christine’s time on the show before she left in season 5. We’re now in season 8 of the show, and a lot has happened since Christine departed. Heather Rae Young, now El Moussa, also departed the show, though not by choice as she was let go following the birth of her son.

New additions since the show’s shakeup include Bre Tiesi and Chelsea Lazkani. These two have a very, and I mean VERY interesting history with one another. They’re like the new Chrishell and Christine of the series. Their feud came from the fact that Chelsea was being judgmental of Bre’s family situation. For those of you that don’t know, Bre is the mother of Nick Cannon’s child, Legendary. He is one of many children Cannon has. More specifically, he’s 1 of his 12 children. He has multiple baby mamma’s. Mariah Carey is one of them.

Just recently, Bre opened up about her decision to be a one-and-done mamma. While attending Mary Bonnet’s book launch, Bre told Us Weekly, ‘I think that motherhood is probably the craziest experience I’ve ever had in my life because it’s really the best thing that could ever happen to you. It’s quite a journey, but it’s nothing anyone could ever prepare you for and I would never give it up for anything. So I love it. It’s funny when people say to me, ‘Oh, you don’t want to have another baby with Nick Cannon.’ I’m like, ‘No, I just don’t want to have another baby. I feel like it would be selfish and f—ed up to bring another child into the world when I already have so much mom guilt about the child that I have now and wanting to give him the world, but also wanting to have my career where I want it to be and be a good partner. It’s a lot and I’m just trying to be accountable.’

And of her very untraditional relationship with Cannon Bre said, ‘We’ve been together for years. Whatever everyone else puts together about other people involved is their own narrative. I don’t really care. We’re very happy. I just don’t know why everyone’s so upset by it. But also, go be upset. I don’t really care. Keep talking about it. It is what it is.’ Chelsea was the one person at the office who had the most to say about Bre’s life choices.

When she first started the show, Chelsea was a married mother of two. She had certain beliefs of what a family should look like, which was odd to me because in her family, her husband was a stay-at-home dad, an already untraditional family dynamic. With that said, she spent an entire season wasting her energy feuding with Bre because of it. Season 8 of ‘Selling Sunset’ saw Chelsea going through many changes in her life, and Bre was the one who started it all for her by telling her some unflattering news about her husband, Jeff Lazkani.

The beginning of season 8 showed some promise for a Bre-Chelsea reconciliation. Though it’s hard to call it that as they weren’t even friends to begin with. Bre reached out to Chelsea after she heard from her friend that Chelsea’s husband was seen kissing another woman multiple times. Hearing the news was personal to Bre as her her ex-husband, Johnny Manziel, who made a cameo appearance on the latest season as he was considering buying a house Bre was showing, cheated on her.

When they met at the elegant bar/restaurant, Bre was very empathetic towards Chelsea as she told her the news that could practically destroy her. And it did. It destroyed her. Chelsea was trying to be strong and put on a brave face and a smile as she’s told the news. But then she can’t hold her pain anymore and breaks down. A tear streams down her face, and Bre just looks at her not knowing what to say or do. It was a very emotional scene. Even I can admit that. It was almost painful to watch someone as strong as Chelsea be so vulnerable in that moment.

But the scene was just that – a moment; a very brief moment that showed promise of what could’ve been a beautiful friendship. Some time later, after having time to adjust your her new situation, Chelsea makes an accusation to Chrishell and Emma, a fellow real estate agent, that Bre orchestrated the scene where her friend told her of her husband’s infidelity at a house showing to see how Bre could destroy her life. And of course, this stirs up drama yet again between the two. Bre is absolutely tired and feels like she can’t win no matter what she does. Christell and Emma, but especially Chrishell, seemed to be put in the middle of all this drama. Emma seemed to be siding with Chelsea more than Bre even though she was friends with both individually.

Chrishell didn’t necessarily take sides on the show, but there have been new developments since then. Bre was recently hit with a lawsuit filed by three (!) former employees. In a Snapchat Q&A with fans, Chrishell opened up about her friendship with Bre, and where it stands. She said, ‘This one has some nuance to it and is a little painful to answer, obviously. There was an element of, I could see where Bre was trying to do the right thing and we are on a reality show, so there are pieces of the puzzle that I could understand. All of that being said, of course I understand where Chelsea is coming from. That’s why I was really caught in the middle of seeing both sides. That being said, there was a lawsuit that came out afterwards and I unfortunately got some insider looks into some of that. I’ll just leave it at that. Unfortunately, I will just say that I don’t have a friendship with her right now, and just kind of really disappointed at that whole situation. She has an ongoing lawsuit going on. If what is involved in the lawsuit and her own text messages become public, you guys will see. And if they don’t, just understand I have my personal reasons.’

The three former employees are seeking $3 million in damages each. They state that while working for Bre, they were harassed, discriminated against, and/or retaliated against on the basis of their sex, gender, and/or sexual orientation. Her former personal assistant, Kenneth Gomez, stated that Bre would repeatedly make derogatory and demeaning comments about members of the LGBTQ community. Lucy Par also alleged that if she didn’t feel tasks were performed up to par, Bre would treat her in a vulgar and violen manner. Finally, Amanda Bustard  alleged that she witnessed Bre treat other employees with inappropriate and violent behaviour, and stated that she witnessed Bre threaten employees with physical violence.

Here’s the deal…

I can absolutely understand where Chrishell is coming from when she says she’s no longer friends with Bre. Since her divorce with Hartley, she got married to her partner, G Flip, a non-binary Australian musician. She’s faced a lot of backlash and homophobia from the public, and even her co-workers, specifically Nicole Young, with whom she never got along from the very beginning. Some even called her a fake lesbian.

Chrishell has dealt with the homophobia she’d endured since she went public with G Flip with dignity and grace. And even in this new situation with Bre, she’s being as cordial as she possibly can be given the circumstances. She’s become close friends with Bre since she joined Oppenhiem Group. She, along with Emma and Mary, took her under her wing. They were always supporting one another, posting pictures together, speaking highly of each other. It was refreshing to see that the beef Bre had with Chelsea, who was also close with the girls, especially Chrishell and Emma, didn’t change the relationship they had with Bre.

But again, I don’t blame Chrishell for not staying friends with Bre as she knows the details of the lawsuit. She’s part of the LGBTQ community herself. To know that her friend, someone that she became really close with and became part of her inner, intimate circle was part of that homophobia that she’d endured would be heartbreaking. To know that someone you trust and cherish would deliberately hurt another person due to something like their sexual orientation or any other reason that defines you as a person makes you question everything you know and thought of that person.

I wouldn’t want her in my life either if I were in Chrishell’s shoes. I know this because I’d been through situations before where I had to let go of friendships due to their views and values. Mostly for me, it had a lot to do with what my so-called-friends, if you could even call them that, thought of people with disabilities, rape victims, LGBTQ community, and, now more than ever before, Israel. Last year, when the war between Israel and Hamas was just at its core, a friend told me of her Israeli friend who was pro-Hamas. She told me that in hopes to change my views of my support towards Israel in the war. When I told her of an acquaintance of mine who’s gay posting Instagram stories in support of Hamas, and how it hurt me, she shrugged her shoulders and said to me that people had the right to think and view whatever and how they pleased.

She’s right. Anyone can have an opinion and view on just about anything. But should I have someone in my life who thinks so poorly on a group of minority I’m a part? Should I have someone in my life who doesn’t support the country I come from? Let me be clear, I’m part of the LGBTQ community as well. I know for a fact that if I were a part of the Hamas supporters, I would’ve been killed in seconds if they knew I was bisexual. The media really does make you believe in solidarity in making people believe that being pro-Hamas is right. Celebrities love to talk about Palestinian children and their endurance during this war. But what about Israeli children? With that said, our friendship hasn’t been the same since, for more reasons than just that. In fact, I don’t even know if we’re still friends in the first place. I don’t even know if I want to be friends with her, and I’ll talk more about it in a future post.

I realize that I’m going completely off topic, and I’m not sorry for that. It’s a very important conversation to be had. Many would try to avoid having it, but it’s just not me. It’s not who I am. I’m sure the Israel-Hamas conflict will come up on this blog in the future. It’s just as important is speaking about disability, women’s health, and women’s issues as I do on this blog. Let’s not shy away from that. Let’s not be afraid to speak on politics and on things that matter. The more we speak, the less taboo it becomes.

Back to Bre…

I recently watched Simon Sinek’s interview with Trevor Noah. The entire interview was about friendship, and how we, as a society, give it less and less meaning. It’s especially true for men. Sinek even said to Noah that women make better CEO’s and entrepreneurs because they have a better understanding of emotional intelligence, and therefore. While watching that interview and listening to him tell such promising feminist tales, I couldn’t help but wonder, ‘Is it really true?’

I wasn’t questioning whether women make better CEO’s than men. But rather, I was questioning whether they actually have better emotional intelligence; whether they actually do make better friends than men do. Or rather whether they make better CEO’s for the reason of them having a better understanding of emotional intelligence or for other reasons? We could take Bre and use her as an example. Her mind certainly works like an entrepreneur. She showed that on ‘Selling Sunset’. Particularly when she wasn’t afraid to ask Jason, her boss, for a higher commission rate because she knew her worth.

But it’s been proven time and time again that Bre doesn’t make a very good friend; not to mention that she damaged someone’s entire life by telling Chelsea what she heard from someone who doesn’t even know, or met for that matter, Chelsea in the first place. As the show’s 8th season was just about to air and the clip where Bre told Chelsea the news about her husband that would change the course of her life was released, Chelsea wrote on X, formerly known as Twitter, ‘Bre brought her racist friend on the show to try to ruin me. Never met the Amanda girl a day in my life but her & Bre in her words wanted to ‘take me down’. I took the scene because it was already a storyline. It was all premeditated, I just handled it the best way I could.’

All I can do is put myself in Chelsea’s shoes. And all I can say to that is, I don’t blame her for having doubts and questioning Bre’s motives for telling her about her husband’s infidelity. Bre also seemed a little too happy when she heard the news from her friend. Chelsea confronted Bre for her questionable deed on the show, to which Bre responded with hostility. With that said, it’s safe to say that the two aren’t friends. In fact, the only other real estate agent at the Oppenheim Group that Bre seems to be close with is Mary. Just recently, Bre attended Mary’s book launch for ‘Selling Sunshine’.

So to answer my own question, yes; but also no. A woman can be a good CEO. A woman can be a bad CEO. A woman can have a great understanding of emotional intelligence. A woman can also not have a good understanding of emotional intelligence. I just don’t think you can put everything in a box. It doesn’t work that way. ‘Selling Sunset’ shows just how vastly different female entrepreneurs can truly be. For instance, I personally don’t think that Bre has a good understanding of what emotional intelligence really is. I don’t think she makes for a good friend. And I don’t think she makes for a good leader. Her storyline and motives that we saw on ‘Selling Sunset’, as well as her three ongoing lawsuits, prove just that. Her lack of emotional intelligence is what makes her a bad entrepreneur. So I guess, the real answer is…. Yes, a better understanding of emotional intelligence is what makes a woman a better entrepreneur. It’s more important than any product you’re selling or any service you provide.

On the contrary, I think Mary makes all those of things. When she was promoted by Jason to work as their boss while Jason and his brother worked on bringing another office location to life in a previous season, the other agents assumed that it was made that way due to favoritism because Jason and Mary used to date. The person who seemed to have the biggest issue with this change was Bre. I completely disagreed with that. She got that promotion because she deserved it. Chrishell is also one of Jason’s exes, and we didn’t see her her getting any promotions at work.

Mary is someone who works her a** off to get what she wants. She never seems to care about any drama that goes on in the office. It’s not like she’s careless and oblivious. But rather that she’s all about being professional and getting what she needs to get done at work. She’s a good friend, and yet she’s always shied away from getting involved in conflicts that had nothing to do with her. And unlike Bre, you don’t hear about her being unkind to her employees. But more so, she almost quit ‘Selling Sunset’ because producers triggered her trauma, but prevailed and showed her strength by continuing on with the show thanks to the advice of her husband. In a new interview to promote her book, Bonnet opened up more about her journey on starring in the show.

She said on the Pop Report Podcast, ‘After, I think it was season six, after Palm Springs, I actually called [husband] Romain and I was like, I think I’m done. And he was like, ‘Really?’ I was like, ‘It’s going to change our life. And that means you’re probably not going to be on it either and stuff too. So I just want to talk this through because I really don’t think this is good for my mental health because I was on hormones and stuff. When I was crying at the end, I was actually – and now with the book, people will realize what I was crying about actually, because it looked like it was because I couldn’t deal with the girls and I cannot handle it. It was because we were going to this club. And I was like, ‘No, I, I’m not doing that because I don’t go to clubs without my husband there to protect me because of the sexual assault.’ And so I am very, very cautious about where I go and who I go with. And it just brought up a lot of the traumatic feelings. And then I said, ‘I’m not going.’ And [the producers] said, yes, you are. And I said, no. And I was like, no means no. So I started freaking out. I was like – and I wasn’t drinking at the time, so I was like, okay, fine. What do you want me to do? You want me to drink? I’ll drink. You want this? I’m not going. And I lost it. And I just started hyperventilating.

And of Christine Quinn, who was once best friends with Mary, possibly returning to the show, Mary said, ‘No. We have plenty of people that start the drama. The only reason I say that, like, I will always care about her, but it just made it so toxic. And it wasn’t just on camera, it was behind the scenes too with so many cast members. And it was just a very, very toxic environment. And it broke my heart because I will always love her and care about her. That was not healthy for anybody.’

More about Mary in the next post…