The Graceful Boon

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I’ve recently been listening to a lot of podcasts. I like to stay motivated, and educated at the same time, while I write. Lately, I’ve been listening to Jay Shetty’s podcast. If I could only use two words to describe and define what the word ‘motivation’ means, I’d use his name. The latest episode I got to watch was with Kim Kardashian. He’d actually previously interviews with three out the five Kardashian – Jenner sisters. One being Kin, and then there were Khloe Kardashian and Kendall Jenner.

I want to first talk about Kim’s interview. I’m not going in his chronological order, but rather my chronological order. My previous post was career path and how I thought it not going according to plan twice meant I was a failure. Now, of course, I realize that it’s father from being truthful. Even if I did want to give up because my insecurities got the best of me just the same as they did before, I wouldn’t be able to. I have a son who will look up to me and watch every move I make when he grows up. What kind of an example would I be setting for him if I continue giving up on everything I consistently start working on an idea and then give up as soon as sh*t gets hard?

On Jay Shetty’s ‘On Purpose’ podcast, Kim talked about many things, such as her kids, motherhood and its hardships, her businesses, and her relationships. When I say she talked about relationships, I don’t mean that she talked about any of her romantic relationships such as with Kanye West and Pete Davidson. Instead, I’m talking about professional relationships. What was most interesting to me about Kardashian’s conversation with Shetty was the importance and the value of the length a professional relationship lasts. According to Kardashiaan, the length of your professional relationships says a lot about you as a person. As someone who’s rarely worked with the same people for a long period of time throughout my professional life, I can honestly say that I truly disagree with her.

Let me just begin by saying that even before I became a freelance writer, I still had short-term professional relationships. All the part-time jobs I had throughout high school and college lasted less than a year. Throughout my freelancing career, I only had two long term clients that I worked on multiple projects with; and they were on and off professional relationships. It wasn’t like I worked on an ongoing basis. If we compare it to friendships and/or romantic relationships, It’d be considered a failure. In business terms, freelancing in particular, it’s a success because it means that people really want to work with you because you’re good at what you do. The rest of my clientele, though, were one project based clients throughout the 6 years of my freelancing business.

So what does it say about me while knowing that I’ve practically never had long-term professional relationships? If Kim Kardashian was the one to judge me, she’d probably say that my professionalism is questionable. I’d respect that. I find her to be a very respectable business woman, and that’s probably why I write about her so much on this blog. I agree with her to a certain degree. It’s a tricky situation to explain. How long you lasted in the same workplace matters, but to a certain degree. In the world we live in now that is so confusing and unpredictable, it’s difficult to understand why someone might stay employed at the same company for too long or why someone can’t withhold a job for a long time.

Someone might’ve gotten a temporary job just to support themselves while they go through a transition phase in their careers or lives as a whole. Someone might not be able to quit their jobs after working there for over a decade because the job market is tough and they have to feed their family. Someone might have had a toxic employer and they had no choice but to quit their job because it was affecting their health. Case and point, we really shouldn’t be so judgmental on people’s relationships, whether personal or professional. The longest personal relationship I’ve had, which excludes my family, is the one I’ve had with my husband, which is going on 12 years. Most of my other personal relationships throughout my 20’s, friendship speaking, all have lasted 3 or so years. The friends that I have now have all lasted for more than a decade, and they all have had their ups and downs throughout the years. In fact, there were many years in between that we weren’t on speaking terms because I was too sick to even care about friendships. People change constantly, especially in their 20’s. What was good for you a few years ago might not be good for you now, and what is good for you now might not be good for you in the future. Who’s to say that it’s not okay? Change is always positive.

Relationships are hard, and it doesn’t matter if it’s your relationship with your employer, your clients, your significant other, your in-laws, your friends, your parents, or your kids. Absolutely all relationships are hard. Kelly Clarkson said so herself when she appeared on Zane Lowe’s show recently to promote her new album and talked about her divorce. It’s just as hard for others as well. For some, certain relationships in their lives might be harder; so hard that it’s best to cut them out of their lives for good, and that’s okay. We’re not the ones to ever judge anyone’s actions. We’re not living in their shoes and we don’t understand their full story. So if I were to be in the same room as Kim Kardashian, I’d tell her that she has a point to a certain extent, but for the most part, she’s wrong.

But Kim Kardashian isn’t the only one with this mindset on professional relationships. In fact, most recruiters in the job market have that mindset. I’m not sure if it’s because they’re told my HR managers to look into these types of details when they look at job candidates’ resumes or if it’s because it’s actually them looking at resumes just as Kim Kardashian does. No matter the case, I wish more and more people were open minded because, let’s face it, a resume just gives a first impression on a person. Not even a first impression, but a first look or a first glimpse to a person. Just recently, I got a new opportunity to be working on something new (more on that later) based on who I am, what I’d been through and how I thrived despite my hardships, and, according to the person who gave me the opportunity, the positive energy that I bring out. That’s the type of open mindfulness that I want to see in the world.


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