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‘Love Is Blind’ is a show that has good intentions, or at least it had good intentions when it first aired back in 2020. The Netflix show is where single 20 and 30 year old men and women meet each and other and date without seeing each other for 10 days. After the 10 days, they choose who they want to propose to, and only meet face-to-face after they get engaged. They then have 4 weeks to date in the real world until their wedding day, where they decide whether they want to go through with the wedding and spend the rest of their lives with those they chose as their partners for the show.

I loved the premise of the show, and it looked promising in the first season, and even in the second season. All the couples who got married in the first season are still happily married. The two couples who did get married in the second season ended up getting divorced a short time after the show was aired. And the third season was such a mess that I don’t even remember who the contestants were in the first place. The fourth season was even worse, but there were two couples that really stood out for me, and they were Brett and Tiffany and Zack and Bliss.

I’ll be writing about Zack and Bliss, as well as Irina, in the next blog post (YES, Love Is Blind gets TWO blog posts!), but here I’d like to discuss Brett and Tiffany and talk about why they’re actually important even though they practically had no drama on the show except for Tiffany falling asleep during one of their pod dates. Some might find it boring, especially considering the fact that reality TV lives off of drama, but I, on the other hand, found it refreshing. Their relationship showed what a healthy and loving relationship should look like.

There was one scene in particular that really made me think deeply about my parents’ relationship and what it taught me, as well as my own relationship and what I hope my son will take away from it. It was where Brett was having a one-on-one conversation with Tiffany’s father to ask for his blessing to marry his daughter and talked about about him witnessing his parents’ relationship and what he learned from it. Specifically he talked about how his mother went through a mental illness and through everything they’d been through, his father never even had a thought of leaving the family.

My parents have been married for almost forty years. It wasn’t all rainbows and sunshine when it comes to their relationship. But I witnessed that no matter what, they’d work things out and move forward. I personally feel like it was something that was important for me to witness as a child in order for me to experience that in my own relationship. But not only was it important for me to experience it, it was rather more important for me to appreciate this in a man.

Let’s face the facts – dating is hard, and dating gets to be much harder as we get older. Some of my friends who were single in the late twenties and early thirties would tell me all about their dating stories and they were all just horrifying. The more dating stories I listened to, the more grateful I was that I didn’t have to think about dating. It’d be even harder now that I have a child. I wouldn’t allow just anyone to be involved in my son’s life, and dating is just a lot harder when there’s a child involved. It’s not for the reason that a parent wouldn’t allow just anyone into their children’s lives. It’s a lot more than that.

But I won’t put too much thought into what life could be like if I were to be a single mother. I wouldn’t even want to think about what my life would be like if my husband and I were to ever separate. My point was hypothetical, and I’d like it to remain that way. What I do want to emphasize on instead is what I want my son to learn through witnessing my relationship with my husband.

My husband and I have been together for 12 years. Just like it was with my parents, it wasn’t all rainbows and sunshine throughout our entire relationship. And just like my parents, not once did we ever think of giving up on our relationship, especially him, even though we had all the reasons in the world to do so, especially him. We went through my husband learning about my life with cerebral palsy and him adapting to it. We went through my husband’s father not accepting me as his son’s girlfriend. We went through life after surviving a car accident. We went through life with one of us living with a chronic illness. We went through infertility. And more…

If there’s anything I want my son to learn through witnessing his parents’ relationship, it’s that nothing and no one is ever worth giving up on someone you love. I heard someone say once, ‘If you love something, you gotta go for it.’ And that’s exactly how I want him to live his life. I want him to just go for it. It doesn’t matter what I or his dad think about it, and it doesn’t matter how hard it might get. Nothing and no one should ever be a good enough reason for him to give up on someone. And with that, my husband and I made a promise to ourselves, as well our son, that we will support and accept our son no matter what life he chooses for himself.

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